Broken Sea Glass

Friday, June 30, 2006

"No shadow to look back at, just a blank stare."

Well, I think I can now find some sort of will to write something. But no promises. Overcasts are the worst type of weather update I can ever get in Arizona. I can't stand them, honestly, they are always humid days and burns the flesh without you even noticing the crime going on. ARG, haha. More bad dreams, always have to have those terrifying dreams where your trying to drive home and then there are cops surounding the area, a murderer is in out myts. And, ofcourse, me being stubburn, I find my way driving through the cops, breakingmany laws, because I just want to go home and eat my food and watch a movie. And it just so happens that the killer is in my home. Blood is scortched everywhere, and then... well, I can't remember, but I think thats when he jumps out and kill me. Ha.
No news on Jeremiahs head, not sure whats going on with that, I think he just put it aside to deal with later. Isn't that just the smartest thing you have ever heard? Ireland is comming up, I am excited about that, yippy. I might be going out later to look for new shoes, but not sure yet. Have to go, dads cat is meowing for a lap to lay on. HAha

Thursday, June 29, 2006

17 written out

I am seventeen now, isn't that a miricle. Don't feel any different, the only thing that has changed is I write 17 instead of 16 on papers. I'm not in the most talkative mood at the moment, just wanted to change the updation from April to June, lol

Thursday, April 20, 2006

deaming another future

I had a dream lastnight that has kept me thinking all morning. I had a dream that it was the future, and we had another holocost type of thing going on. Only it wasn't about the jews, had nothing to do with religion. It was the law, you couldn't have children unless the government said you could. They killed all the children you had that was against the law. So me and a few other kids were trying to hide, running through the woods to get away from the police and their guns. Orders are if a child disobays the law then they are shot down, if they are an illegal child, they are either shot on sight or put in a camp where they work until they are put in a chamber of poisonous gas. While my friends and I were running we found a small two story cottage that was owned by an kindly old woman. We ran inside and asked for help, there had been a whole platoon of men in their uniforms and guns holstered around their shoulders. They were looking for us. Had been for days now. She took us through the house to a dresser, she was able to peel off the side wood placement and showed us a hidden room. One by one each of us crawled in that room, trying to be silent in case they came in without us knowing it. Had no way of knowing for sure how far behind they were from us, all we knew was they were close enough to have our heads on their wall. There was this musky smell that never left since this had all began some years back, so stuffy that it was hard to breath. As we crowtched on the floor of the hidden room, our breaths grew sharper, old resting dust rolled their way into the air with our emptying air. Then a sound arose I looked through the cracks in the floor, peering down I saw the commander bombarding in, his heavy boots shook the floor each time they landed flat on the floor. He questioned the woman as several other soldiers came in, shotguns still slung about their shoulders, and small, yest powerfull, pistols holstered at their sides on thick leather belts. They were Americans. Since the war had begun, the new ruling had set in, countries invaded other countries, mixing cultures and guns. These men were germans. Cigar smoke rose to our noses, it smelt ten times better then the old blood painted streets that were never cleans. the worst time was when it rained, the bloods smell would rise and reawaken, chocking fearful travelers to a point of nearly passing out. The men searched the house, and then they came to the room the hidden door was in. The commander had already flung his cigar away, now he was smelling the air, a hint of suspision. Then agrin curled at the end of his mouth, he could smell us. But he played cool, telling his ment we weren't in there. And as they started to leave he said facing the door, yet was directed toward me, "Haha, I finally found you." Then he stepped out of the room, and left in their cars, soem men walked. Confusion no doubt swept over our faces, it was obvious there was something we were missing. When the lady came back and said it was all clear, we rustled our of the hiding place, thanked her for her mercy, and ran out the door. There was a dozen old and beaten up tractors that were a hundred yard away from the house. As we ran up tp them we heard weird rawring sounds fromt he woods, it was a machine, no doubt the butcher collecting himeself some animals. Thats when hundres of sheep came running out of the dences woods and straight past us, then running back out of the clearing and back into the woods. We were able to grab of them, and set him on the tractor. He could be useful for the wool, and maybe lateron for food. This was desparate times, thoughts of harming animals for food didn't come to mind anymore, it was all just survival. We jumped on the tractor, all three of us. And Made our way through the hidden paths of a dense future.

What a dream huh?

Monday, April 10, 2006

Sleeping beauty needs a nap

Yeah, I am a bit tired right now, have so many tests and quizes to study for this week so I got tired when thinking of all that studying. Today shot off with a lot of bumpage, and still has yet to steady itself. I friend of mines dog was put to sleep lastnight. Some sort of brain issues where something exploded inside of her so they had to put her down, really sad. I felt sorry for her until I found out what they do for every dogs passing. They cremate there dogs! Isn't that crazy? They also take the collars from their dogs and hang them up on the wall in her parents room. Is it just me or is that just weird? I almost laughed when I heard this, which brings me to the point of saying I have no sympathy after hearing that. I understand that its really sad when a pet of the family dies,but that just sounds rediculous to me. My friend even said she wont let go of the dead animal for a couple of weeks, that she wont beable to even go in her parents room to see the collar, which was weird all by itself. She gets attached to any animal, even if she sees a dead one on the street she says she gets really sad, might even cry at times. I used to be like that, when I was 10! Blar! Ok, so enough of the cremated dawg. Well, Jeremiah called me up today and said he got me an eisel! Which is awsome! He says he might even find me some oil paint so I can practise and what not. My dad got me a air brush gun and paint, even bought me a compresser so I don't have to keep on using air cans. Yark >_<
So maybe tomarrow I can find something to practise on, cardboard or somethin' like that. Trying to get back into my artistic state as you can tell. Well, I need to get back to studying and doing my homework, so peace out dawgs >_<

Monday, April 03, 2006

Drowning in the Foggy Mind

What has happened here? Through thick clouds and high waters the surface will never be breached. Not like in the mind. To the cliff I say, dive down, rise up. The solution to a perfect ending in that of a troubled mind. The whispering of so many voices, if only they could hear them aswell. But no, they are ignorant. They don't listen because they don't want to believe. Save me not to work your name about the papers, not to be remembered as a hero of your people. But save me because your heart bids you to. To the south is the sun, and the north is the night, with your complications the earth has recided off its axle. Never again will life exist in here nor there. Just send the peace that was taken from us, give it back as one last farewell. For in the end, a good final breath is better then short struggle in resistance.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

Shot down in midair

Cocking the gun
aiming its barrel
its a new way to shun
hark thy harral

Four verses and it says enough to show how I am feeling right now. Seriously, things are not going well right now.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Moderate brain rot

Well, for the past couple of days when I watch a movie I start getting into this mode of writing. And it lasts for five minutes after the movie before I hit the floor dead tired of thinking so hard. Yeh see, I really want to write a book, but I am having a hard time of what I could write about. I want somethin people would want to read, but unique from all the other novels. Well, my favorite author is Dean Koontz, and I have been hoping to be successful like him. His books, a majority of the ones I have read, are really awsome. So I started thinking that this whole planning a book out isn't working for me. So I started remembering some of the dreams I have had, both the scary and exciting ones. Only I don't know how to plan them out and get them all ready into writing out form. Thats when I saw this movie, Halflight, a confusing and perplexifying movie indeed. But the main charactor is a writer, and how she does it is she writes down what happens in each chapter on flashcards and puts them in a collum as she writes, so she can look at them for referance. Seems like a good idea. So I am thinking maybe I should try that, takes a while, but writers block takes longer, haha. I have been having some crazy dreams today, even had one during my nap today. Only I don't like that one, got me all depressed, and when I woke up I couldn't tell from reality and my dream. Wasn't sure if what I drempt was real or not. Kind of funny huh? But it also screws me up in this head off mine. I have been doing a lot of thinking, more then usual. Things comming up I have long forgot, thats the beauty of forgetting, its one less thing to take in. Well, I think my eyes have been opening a bit more then I am used to. Usually I am a stubborn hornet, taking in new information is not my preference, especially when I disagree with it. Well, I have feeling a bit smothered lately, like some is always breathing down my neck, watching everything I am doing, critisizing by the pound. But all this writing in my blog is making me pause and daze out for a few minutes to think of something else, thats usually how I end up getting in a writing mood. So maybe I will write something up real quick. New. I have noticed I always write when I am in a bummer mode. What a motivation huh? haha.

A soft pounding ran through his vains, his fingertips felt the beat of drastic measures. His hands shook for every breath cut short, sweat dripped from his brow with autumn colors. For every bloody boot that swept forward, two clean polished shoes stammered back. Amongst the battle field are two types of soldiers, a warrior and one a coward hiding behind the warriors. The Warrior looked at the weasle, the true skum of the wild. He spat at the cowards shined shoes, and grunted with disaproval.
And with a inward turn of his brow, and an ashamed smooth voice the warrior said, " And so the worlds of two lives come apart, but now one of them shall be pieced together while the other world drowns in its greed." With those words that spoke just above a whisper, the man threw himself forward with his sword in both hands ready to end the final unneeded second world.".......

To Be Continued :)